Two Reasons We are NOT Winning Parents-of-the-year

So, the first has to do with Alex.  This last weekend, all of Josh's friends from high school were in town, as one of them lives in China and was back visiting for a couple of weeks.  Well, one of the guy's parents had rented a house in a small beach town about 15 mins down the road from us, so he had everyone over there for the day.  The neighborhood was gorgeous - the house was on a dead end street (like, not even a culdesac.  like, the road just stopped) with a decent size yard and a bunch of houses all around it.  It was also probably 3 houses back from the water and on a hill, so you could see the ocean from it.  It was beautiful.  So, anyway - it was a gorgeous day and we were all outside talking and the kids were playing in the yard.  All of the kids but one - the Big Al.  Of course, I didn't even realize that he wasn't in the yard until Josh asked me where he was (ok, so there is another reason - I guess there are 3 reasons why I won't be parent-of-the-year and just 2 for Josh).  So, we started looking for him and just as I was about to start panicking, HE WALKS OUT OF THE NEIGHBOR'S HOUSE!  Yep!  Apparently, he was being his curious self and just walked right into this poor guy's house.  Can you imaigne?  This guy was probably 75 years old and he was just sitting in his living room when all of a sudden Alex walks into his house.  Too funny.  And, for the record, had we not been in the neighborhood that we were in (hence, my thorough description of how gorgeous and quaint it was), we would have been a bit more worried.  Also for the record, we have both agreed to come up with a plan going forward whenever we are out and about with Al - one of us will be fully responsible for his whereabouts. 

And, the second reason why we won't be winning parents-of-the-year?  They are doing construction on our road and today, on the way to work, Alex asks, "What truck doing?"  So, Avery answers, "Alex, he is digging up the Ass Holes."  Uh....what?????  Clearly she didn't say what I think she said.  So, I ask her to repeat it and sure enough, "they are digging up the Ass Holes!"  OH!!!  "Digging up the Asphalt??"  Avery - "yeah.  That's what I said!"  Overall, this is a rather funny story.  However, the point is - she has clearly heard "Ass Holes" somewhere.  I blame her father.  That said, we're back to 2 reasons each.