Thursday, July 26, 2012

For Sale!

What:  One three-year-old boy

Special Features:  Does not take any effort on the owner's behalf to cause boy to have a meltdown.  Cut his chicken the wrong way?  Meltdown.  Give him milk that isn't hot enough (even though if you make it any hotter, it will burn his mouth)?  Meltdown.  Fluff the pillow the wrong way?  Meltdown.  Put the wrong episode of Bob the Builder on TV?  Meltdown.  Don't let him sit on the couch with a sopping wet diaper (yes, he still wears these to bed at night)?  Meltdown.  Put the wrong pajamas on him at night?  Meltdown. 

Extra Bonus Features:  Meltdowns?  They can last anywhere from 30 mins to 2 hours. 

Return policy:  May only be returned if meltdowns described above have not occurred within 2 weeks prior to return. 

Price: FREE!

Customer Reviews:

ANH from LC says:

"Overall, a good boy but can be really annoying and loud sometimes."

JRH from LC says:

"Boy is great at sports and fun to hang out with most of the time.  However, there are times when I want to ring his neck and I wonder what happened to the original boy we owned?"

WEH from LC says:

"Boy is very sweet sometimes.  However, there are other times when I'm pretty certain no one on the planet could cause me to be more frustrated and generally want to run away and hide until the boy is out of the terrible 3 stage."


Caution:  May result in strangulation (of both owner and product) if meltdowns continue.








Monday, July 9, 2012

Guess who's potty trained????

Yep - that's right!  The Big Al Man is potty trained. 




Well....mostly.  I have to say that someone up there likes us.  We have somehow been blessed with two children who, relatively speaking, were pretty easy to potty train.  I mean, Avery was potty trained about 5 seconds after she turned 2 and she did it all pretty much on her own with very minimal accidents.  But, I'll be honest - I was a bit more concerned with Al.  I mean, first of all, he's a boy and I think that we all know that boys are harder to train than girls.  But, also, I mean - he just really didn't seem at all interested.  In fact, the first time that I ever put him in underwear (which was probably about 6 months ago, so yes - early), I remember he peed within 10 mins of wearing them and when I asked him if he peed in his underwear, he just blatantly looked at me and said no - with pee dripping down his leg.  Reason number 1 why he wasn't ready 6 months ago.  Well, about 2 months ago, Daycare informed us that they thought that he was ready for underwear, which was great.  The only problem?  It didn't really fit into my social schedule.  For those of you who have been through this, you know that it is a giant pain in the butt because the days of running errands, going to the playground, going to the beach, basically doing anything where there isn't a toilet within a couple of feet of you? Gone.  For a good couple of days and/or weeks.  And, for those of you who know me or follow this blog, you know that the end of April/all of May were two very social months for us, so I really just didn't have the time to devote to this process.  Until...Memorial Day.  So, we put him in underwear and I did the typical, "Come on Alex, let's go to the potty" routine about once every 10 mins - no joke.  And, he did really well!  But, then the true test - the Memorial Day Parade where he would be in public with lots of distractions.  I have to say - we did well in the beginning.  We went to our local restaurant and used their restroom before the parade and then used the restroom in the community center during the parade.  But,the bouncy house?  That proved to be a bit too much.  The real problem?  He came out having clearly peed his pants and didn't even realize it.  FAIL.  At this point, I decided that we may not yet be ready for this adventure.

But, THEN!  The following weekend?  We went NAKED! Or, Nudies, as Alex likes to call it.  Man - it worked like a charm!  We had no accidents!  It was crazy.  So, from that point on, we have been in underwear and we haven't looked back!  I will say that he is still easily distracted and if there is a lot going on, he will forget to tell us that he has to go.  But, I have to think that is pretty normal at this stage.  Oh - and, one other slight problem.  The naked thing worked really well.  However, the fact that we let him go pee in the yard kind of didn't, as one night, I came home to Josh walking to get the shovel and explaining to me that our son. Yes, our son.  Not our dog.  Had "just taken a dump in the yard."  Apparently, he took the "boys can pee in the woods" thing a bit too literally.  Don't worry - we've nipped that in the bud (or, butt - ha!) and it hasn't happened again.  And, yes - of course, I had to document this by taking a photo (and some of you were even lucky enough to receive the picture via text!), but I will spare you all the details so that we can just focus on the fact that the Holland household is THIS close to being done with diapers forever!  :)